So I guess it has been a while since I last blogged... I went through something and I sort of didn't want to talk about it or blog about it, so I just really really cried about it. But I'm okay now. It was the kind of thing, you just don't want to admit you care about, and you don't want to admit it hurt you because it's not worthy.

The time I spent without blogging was quite normal, I thought I would miss Forever 17 but it was fine, so now that I know that I can live without bloggling I might do it. But anyway, here I am.

Today, the first day of 2008 I'm a little sad, confused, and ashamed. I've been a bad girl I guess, and I'm not sure if I want to stop it, or if I want to keep going. I feel like I'm losing myself, and someday I won't be able to go back to what I was. But I don't want to be the good girl anymore, it never worked for me. But being the bad girl isn't working either. So I'll do both, I guess?

So, what changed in 2007? I'm no longer depressed, or maybe I am, but not that much, maybe just sometimes. My self-esteem is better. I feel a little more confident about myself, I have a little more hope that things will do better this year. On the other hand, I've experimented (sure that's a nice way to put it). And I won't give any details about that.

What do I want for next year? I guess the three basics: health, love, and money. I'm super good on the health department, except on the mental department of the health department. LOL. Hopefully I'll have good luck finding love. And I really really need an improvement on my economic situation.

My 2008 to-do list:

Things I should do but I don't want to:

1. Stop drinking

2. Excercise

3. Stop cursing

4. Be more open

5. Be less proud

Things I want to do but I probably shouldn't:

1. Try drugs

2. Lose weight


Things I want to do and should do:

1. Eat well

2. Learn something new

3. Be more outgoing (without alcohol)

4. Do better at school (I seriously need this one)

5. Stop kissing strangers (I promise I will)

5. Keep being a non smoker (yay)

6. Write on my diary every single day (a hard one)

7. Write more

8. Dress better

9. Work on my manners

10. Learn to drive (I'm about to turn 19, so I think this one is must)

11. Have the summer of my life


So, which ones should be my final 12?

XoXo

Gaby

P.S. Happy New Year everyone. =)

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Now playing: Natalie Imbruglia - Torn
via FoxyTunes

Ok, it seems like I've been doing stupid things lately. This time, I don't feel that guilty. I just can't believe I did it. Why does that sentence seems so familiar?

I think I mentioned before my friends and I were going out on Friday night (yesterday). And we went, it was just us girls. So what went wrong? Well... long story short: I got drunk and kissed a stranger, and one friend did the same...with the same stranger! What the hell...

The thing is, I don't feel guilty or bad because I did it, I feel bad because I've lost my good girl image. My friends always say that I'm the good girl, I'm not that good, but well, they didn't know. So, yesterday they were all shocked, and somehow I couldn't help it. So goodbye good girl.

XoXo
Gaby

P.S. Remember the guy who likes me? I think I could like him, the other day we were talking and he seems nice, and he's like really appropriate. I always have the feeling that for some reason he will stop liking me though.

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Now playing: Nikki Clan - Niñas Mal