Today (or should I say yesterday since it's 1:00 am) has been one of my less productive days. I took a shower thinking a classmate would come by to drop a book. Had I known he wouldn't come...

I called my friend to wish her a happy birhday, it was weird, but at least I did it. Just get it out of the way you know. Yeah, I'm that bad with festivities.

A friend called to invite me to a party from school, but I had no intention to go even if I told her I would think about it. I thought I would miss this people (classmates), but I don't. First it was like, I missed school because it was an excuse to see them, but now I think I'm enjoying my time away from them too much. Please, notice how pathetic I am, here I am, telling you how I didn't even want to go to this party cause it would be boring and I didn't want to see this people, yet, anything there would have been more exciting than what I've been doing these days. Really, I've been in my house, sleeping, watching TV, and reading, the whole time by myself. Believe me, I love doing all of these things, and I missed these activities, but I should be out. It's just that...I have no available friends, for whatever reason, there's not much to do. The only thing I've done, is going to the movies (once), and that's not the wild night I need. Don't get me wrong, you know I'm not that wild.

I've just realized, it's been only about a week of vacation. It felt like a month... A week and I'm dying already, I suck at this.

XoXo
Gaby

I can't wait for these two weeks of vacation to be over. I know. It's stupid! I keep complaining about how frustrating school is, and now that I have two weeks to rest and have fun, I complain about that too. It's hard to explain, but I like my school life, even if that means bad grades and too much work. I like the people (most of them), and I like having something to do. Maybe a description of my vacation days would help.

You know what I did today? Watch TV. Yeah, Grey's Anatomy, Drake & Josh, Gilmore Girls, Cold Case, That' 70s Show, Hannah Montana, Will & Grace, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, Dr. 90210, E! weekly, Lindsay Lohan's E! True Hollywood Story, Friends, and Exposed. And I feel like I missing some.

I know! Too much!

I did do something today though. I had my first driving lessons, and it was okay, I learned a few things I didn't know (and I can't believe I didn't) about driving. Being positive I could say I was okay. I'm concerned about tomorrow though, I will be out on the street, and I know I'm not ready for that. Hopefully, I'll be ready tomorrow, or else that could turn into a rather traumatic experience.

Finally I should probably say something about yesterday.

Yesterday... I was sad, and wasn't there for a friend on her birthday! I never do this, I mean, I always do this but not on birthdays. It used to be my rule: not on birthdays.

It was... bad timing I guess. She called last minute, and it was Sunday, and you may not know this but I don't even shower on Sundays. So, there I was, unshowered, sad, tired, and some other excuses crossed my mind. It's no big deal, I really do believe that, I don't know if it is, but I'm quite certain it's not. So, what if I missed her birthday party? I didn't have a birthday party myself. And a party usually is the same with or without me.

I'm just afraid I'm doing it again, being too tired and sad to be there for my friends. I tend to do this, and I don't even feel like stopping and I know it's wrong. I'm such a horrible person sometimes...

Maybe I'm not in a very happy place and I don't want people to see me. And I don't want to see how okay they are and feel even worse about myself. I know! Selfish!

Maybe I like my school life because it keeps my mind busy, and I don't think about the things I don't have to. Things I think about when I have time (like these two weeks). This thinking is killing me I gotta tell you. And the whole boringness these last days is not helping, I'm left alone with my awful thoughts.

XoXo
Gaby

The semana santa (holy week) has arrived, which means two weeks of vacation. I don't know why, but I'm not excited about it, I should be, even if I'm not going to the beach, I'm not going to school and that should be good enough. Maybe I like school too much, nah, that can't be.

I've been thinking of what to do in these two weeks. There has to be some studying at some point, TV definitely, movies, and I'll probably get wasted once or twice. I'll spend many many hours sleeping, and I'll finish reading Mal de Amores by Angeles Mastretta. And who knows, maybe I'll start a new book. Oh, I just realized most of my planned activities, are loner activities, yeah, maybe I don't feel like seeing people, ok, more like, I don't want to be seen by people. What's wrong with me?

I'll take driving lessons next week (cause I finally have time), I think that could be frustrating. I feel like driving is one of the things I'm not good at, but you know, there's stupid people driving all the time, why can't I? I'll be careful I promise. Anyway, I shouldn't start thinking I'm going to suck at it, I'll stay positive. How hard can it be? LOL.

XoXo
Gaby

I wish I could give you some interesting updates my fellow readers, but they're basically the following:


*I'm oficially on vacation, just one week so I better not get too excited about it. What will I do with my super one week vacation? Let me think about it. I would like to go the beach, but I won't. I would like to go shopping, but I won't. Oh well, I'll be okay. At least I won't be at school. But now that I think about it, I miss it a little. You know, seeing my classmates.

*I've been trying to clean up my bedroom. I'm getting rid of everything I don't need. Hopefully I'll get rid of mostly everything. I know I won't miss it. And less things in my bedroom will make things easier.

*My weekend was not as boring as I thought it would be. I ended up with two potential plans for Saturday, and one surprising plan yesterday.

*I bought white and pink earrings in an attempt to be less tomboyish... I think I'll need more than that though. I should stop wearing the "it sucks here, it sucks there, but more than anything, it sucks to be you" t-shirt.

*I've been enjoying "The Hills". Somehow I feel like Lauren, betrayed by "best friends".

*Oh, and I forgot to mention it before, but you can now subscribe in a reader to my blog. Just click on the "subscribe in a reader" thing. Duh. That was unnecessary I hope.


Bottom line: No good news. No bad news. Could be worse. My life story.

XoXo
Gaby